One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Doom Fish

Greetings, Ninjas in Training!

Awhile ago I received a question from someone we’ll call Fishing Ninja regarding–you guessed it–fish. I’m still kind of a ninja zombie, but since this question involves no research on my part (I swear I’m still working on that chocolate post, really), and apparently I mention fish nowhere on this site…

Gather around, my little ninjalings. It’s time for a story.

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Here’s the thing about fish: in its completely untainted state, it is fine to eat. What I mean by untainted is that you catch it yourself, prepare it in a lemon-free zone, and definitely don’t cook it on one of those public park grills.

The trouble comes when you didn’t catch the fish yourself. Here’s a fun, gross fact: fish and other seafood are typically transported on ice that’s mixed with citric acid. This acts as a preservative, keeps the fish from rotting, and sends unsuspecting ninjas to the emergency room.

Then there’s the issue of contamination at the butcher shop or fish-buying-place (fish butcher? I don’t know). Take a look at that display case. What do you see?

Lemons.

Lemons everywhere.

The juice is very likely all over the knives, counters, and everything else at the fishería. Yes, that is now a word, deal with it. But don’t deal with those lemons if you don’t have a high tolerance.

Eat the one fish, eat the two fish, eat the red fish; as long as you caught them yourself.

Do not eat the doom fish.

That’s all for now… until next time, when life (or a fishería) gives you lemons, RUN!
The Lemon Ninja

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2 thoughts on “One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Doom Fish

  1. I had a citric acid allergy for years. A doctor discovered I had an infection in my body. I took a month and a half of antibiotics. I now can eat anything.

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